A Child’s View of Marriage


Recently we had a special lunch at our home. My daughter, granddaughters and new daughter-in-law were sitting around the table. Conversation flowed easily as we were enjoying each other’s company. During a pause, three-year-old Dee gazed intently at her new aunt and said, “You’re married now, so you can have a baby.”

My daughter-in-law blushed, we all laughed. It took me a moment to give recognition to the simple truth from my granddaughter. I smiled at Dee and said, “You are right.”

In our culture it is easy to overlook the complete design of marriage. It is a commitment and bond between a man and a woman—and it includes the expectation/possibility of new life.

Abigail Rine, a professor at an evangelical university, has written an article about the revised view of marriage that is prominent in our culture.

As I consider my own upbringing and the various “sex talks” I encountered in evangelical church settings over the past twenty years, I realize that the view of marital sex presented there was primarily revisionist. While the ideal of raising a family is ever-present in evangelical culture, discussions about sex itself focused almost exclusively on purity, as well as the intense spiritual bond that sexual intimacy brings to a married couple. Pregnancy was mentioned only in passing and often in negative terms, paraded alongside sexually transmitted diseases as a possible punishment for those who succumb to temptation. But for those who wait, ah! Pleasures abound!

To read the whole article, click here.

High school curriculum puts a strong emphasis on preparation for college. Young women are encouraged to pursue careers. This is fine, but I wonder if it is time for the pendulum to swing back.

The pursuit of a career may involve substantial debt. This is a topic for serious discussion. My observation is that many couples put off or even fear a pregnancy because they have debts to pay off.

We need more celebration of home and family. As wives and mothers we can give thanks for God’s design for the family and our role in it.

Let’s bring our little girls to weddings and baby showers.

We might talk about sex and the gift of fertility more openly and honestly.

Let’s honor the roles of wife and mother in our words and attitudes.