It is so nice to receive compliments and to have the good opinion of others. It is something that I desire. But what about criticism?
Recently I participated in leadership training. A coach critiqued the discussion that I led. For ten minutes I listened to the coach list things I could have approached differently or done better.
I listened quietly, but later I vented to my husband. “I think I got a B- instead of an A.” The next day I brought up the subject again.
My husband said, “Are you still on this topic?”
The criticism pointed me to ways that I could grow and improve. Why was it so hard for me to see that?
This experience reminded me of a critique that I received for a manuscript proposal. My proposal and first chapter was marked up. Only a few lines were unmarked. There were questions about the setting, my format and more. At the time it stung. I had to pause, and gradually I have seen a new approach to this project.
Listening requires active participation. When it includes hearing criticism it is difficult. Sorting through the criticism to see what is helpful is important (not all criticism is helpful).
Listen to advice and accept instruction that you may gain wisdom in the future. Proverbs 19:20 ESV
This post is linked with the Five Minute Friday writing community. Today’s prompt is: LISTEN
It is hard to take criticism. But when we listen, it does help us.
These experiences have led me to muse on the way criticism is given–when it is all negative, without affirming the positive, it can obstruct learning. As believers we have a duty to build each other up, even as we offer critiques–something for me to remember.