Yesterday I began the task of going through my brother’s papers. After years in psychiatric hospitals and then group homes he passed away last June. I was his guardian.
When I saw the prompt for Five Minute Friday, I was already there emotionally. Sadness and REGRET.
When my Dad could no longer handle his finances, I became his rep payee. I have years of bank records and medical records. I am discarding many of the papers, but keeping those that tell his life story.
My brother was diagnosed with schizophrenia as a young adult. His illness shattered our family. Each of us was traumatized by the events that took place.
Over the years my sisters and I had our turn as advocate for our brother. We visited him in the hospital and arranged outings.
Among the papers that I accumulated, are papers that my parents saved. I found my brother’s birth certificate. And I found copies of letters that my father wrote seeking better care for him. Letters looking for answers. Letters from hospital administrators, doctors and a senator. A letter from another parent of a mentally ill son.
My brother’s life was tragic. I do wish that I had understood better the heartache that my parents carried for so many years.//
Now I have to trust God’s word.
And I heard a voice from the throne saying, “Behold, the dwelling place of God is with man. He will dwell with them, and they will be his people, and God himself will be with them as their God. He will wipe away every tear from from their eyes, and death shall be no more, neither shall there be mourning, nor crying, nor pain anymore, for the former things have passed away.” Revelation 21:3-4