Today is my wedding anniversary. As I reflect back on 42 years of marriage I am thankful for my husband and the way our relationship has refined us.
There have been seasons in our marriage. At first we had to learn to live with each other. Children came early in our marriage, and we helped each other parent. When our son developed leukemia we worked hard as a team to support him and get the medical care he needed.
That was followed by a season of grief. Our marriage had been drained of energy and we needed to begin again.
God has been faithful in guiding us and renewing our love.
We have been blessed to see each of our adult children marry. We are thankful for the son-in-laws and daughter-in-law that have increased our family joy.
Now we are grandparents, fully enjoying the blessing of family. Through the years we have learned about ourselves and each other. We know each other’s strength and weaknesses. We have helped our spouse to make changes.
My husband has helped me react to situations with greater patience and thought. I once wrote an angry letter and mailed it immediately. After discussing it with my husband I was ashamed. I went back to the mailbox and inserted a colorful note, requesting that postman send the letter back to my return address. To my amazement and relief the letter came back to me.
We have different ways of doing things—even the simple task of making coffee. While I will measure the coffee grounds after grinding the coffee beans (8 tablespoons for 11 cups of water), my husband puts a generous amount of beans in the grinder. Then he dumps all the ground coffee into the filter lined basket.
He is certain that he has the right amount. He adds a dash of salt (my suggestion) and some cardamon seeds (again, my suggestion) and turns the brew on. I am thankful to have fresh brewed coffee ready every morning. Sunday mornings he brings me a cup with cream and coconut oil when I am still in bed.
Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh. Genesis 2:24
Two are better than one, because they have a good reward for their toil. For if they fall, one will lift up his fellow. Ecclesiastes 4: 9-10a
If you are married, how has marriage refined you? If you are single, do you have a friend that challenges you and encourages you to develop new perspectives?
This is so beautiful. I’m too young to be married right now but I hope to find the same thing in my marriage in the future. I enjoyed reading your article.
Adrienna, thank-you for visiting! May God guide you to a good marriage.
“I went back to the mailbox and inserted a colorful note, requesting that postman send the letter back to my return address. To my amazement and relief the letter came back to me.” — That is amazing! I’ve been married for 27 years next month — we definitely differ in many ways, small and large. One thing I really like about him, that’s not natural to me, is his intentionality about keeping our connection strong with touch, by saying I love you pretty often, and kissing me multiple times per day and any time we part.
Oh, the tenderness in your marriage is sweet. Blessings!
This is so beautiful, Carol. We, too, have had many seasons in our marriage, some difficult, but God has used each season to bring us closer. This year we’ll be celebrating our 45th year. What a blessing! Blessings to you!
Thanks for visiting, Gayle. Your 45th year–that is wonderful!